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May the road rise to meet you,
May the wind be always at your back,
May the sun shine warm upon your face,
The rains fall soft upon your fields and,
Until we meet again,
May God hold you in the palm of His hand.

To ease goodbyes, I started to say “Until we meet again”. It doesn’t erase the pain nor fills the emptiness, but instead of it paralysing me, it gives me the strength to work myself through the day. To clean up the house and at the same time my mind. I know that I can’t have the happy hello’s with a heart literally jumping of joy or the wonderful times together in laughter without the sadness of the goodbyes. Ever since our international life started 16 years ago, I have the feeling that a part of me stays or travels with my loved ones when we part. I know that tomorrow I will be able to feel grateful of what we have shared, already looking forward and making plans of when we will see or speak each other again. But for now I fight against the tears.

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A warm welcome

3/25/2017

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Louvain; Ancient - Alive & Kicking

Seasoned expatriates know that moving back to your home country is often harder than a move overseas. In general you need half a year to settle in for expatriation and a year for repatriation. When we moved to Belgium in December, I tried to organise myself for a hard transition. Aware that not only I changed over the years, that family and friends have full agendas and that our “hometown” has developed into a city of the 21st century; cosmopolitan but still very rural compared to The Hague or Bucharest.

Already in January we received an invitation for a welcome evening at the city hall in February. My husband and I were both very curious and interested to take this opportunity but as we were travelling, we asked if we could join a next welcome and two e-mails later we were registered for March 23.
We were welcomed by two aldermen in the room where the city council holds its monthly meetings; a very impressive neogothic room equipped with modern PA and voting system. Everything breathes the slogan of the city “Eeuwenoud, Springlevend” best translated as “Ancient, Alive & kicking”.
Their message was one of warm welcome, of diversity and togetherness, an invitation to settle and feel at home in Louvain the way hundreds of new citizens and thousands of students do every year.
We got a short tour in the beautiful city hall with a Dutch or English speaking guide and a reception with the opportunity to meet and greet the aldermen and fellow new residents. The local brewed beer which was served, certainly added to the joyful ambiance of the evening and we met interesting people.
I was surprised that it was already 10pm when we headed home with a bag full with city info and free tickets to some touristic places.
As a former community officer at the International School of The Hague, I feel pleased with this well organised and warm welcome. I was born in Leuven, lived here as a student and afterwards a couple of years before my marriage but now I feel for the first time a resident, ready to get involved in this vibrant city.
Home is where your heart is…

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In December 2016 we moved back to Belgium after 16 years of working and living abroad. We were both aware that 'repatriation' can be as challenging as an international move. But moving back to the city where we lived as students and first met, made it a lot easier. Many things haven't changed and Louvain always stayed our "Pied-à-terre". We have family and friends who are happy to have us nearby. But it is still another life, or at least another chapter in our lives.
I'm proud and happy to have found already a course for sewing, something I wanted to learn 30 years ago, but never had time and opportunity coincide.
On weekly base I play Mahjong, something I started in Cayman. I have a lot to learn because they play by the Green Book; with competition rules and counting points, all new to me.
Our house needs some renovations but winter weather doesn't allow to start right away, instead we are making lists.
Weeks are passing quickly as we are filling our agenda with lots of fun things...

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I strongly believe that no matter the miles or hours apart, we stay connected to our loved ones, our home country, our past and our future.
This morning when I finally opened my eyes at 6:30 local time (12:30 in Belgium) after a night of waking up at 00:30, 2:11 and 3:29 for no reason, I look at my phone and read the messages of Facebook informing me that some family members and friends “are accounted for”. Accounted for? What happened? Still half asleep I open the message sent by our youngest son at 3:29: “Brussels attacks: Zaventem and Maalbeek bombs kill many”.
In disbelief I started to reach out to family and friends while reading the news on all media available.
6 hours later I’ve still not turned on TV nor watched anything on YouTube. Feeling numb and hurt although I am miles away and “my” loved ones are not affected.
Grateful for all the friends who reached out to me, to show their support, to pray for my fellow countrymen. Today our “tricolours” flag turned predominantly black, but not without a red heart representing the solidarity chain started on social media. People in Belgium are using #IkWilHelpen to offer aid in the wake of the Brussels attacks. Also a golden ribbon for all the messages of hope and prayers written on the pavements of Brussels Squares: http://on.rt.com/77tq
We are grieving but not terrified and cartoonists have put in drawings where words were not enough: http://focus.knack.be/entertainment/boeken-strips/cartoonisten-reageren-op-aanslagen-brussel/article-normal-681669.html

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The world belongs to those who dare

3/21/2016

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Recently, I went to a book presentation with luncheon at the Ritz Carlton. It was a fund raiser for the Crisis Centre on the island and although I didn’t know the author nor the book, I didn’t hesitate to accept the invitation given by a friend. The life story of Cheryl Strayed is one that makes me realise how lucky I am to never have been exposed to domestic violence. Nevertheless the message that she wants to bring across is one of inner strength and hope. She wants to reach out to everybody who can find inspiration in her story to overcome the roadblocks on your path, to start new, when your life and your person seems shattered into pieces.
A feeling I can relate to and something a lot of the expatriates around the world at some point are confronted with. Relocating and starting new is challenging yet at the same time is opening new possibilities for personal development.
Over the last 15 years, I have learned more about myself than of any of the new places that I lived in. Each time proving (in the first place to myself) that I was capable of doing the impossible. Don’t think I turned into a daredevil, my bucket list isn’t full with high adrenalin activities. But I nourished my curiosity and empathy to enable me to more easily reach out to others, strangers on my path. Slowly I overcome some preconceptions of my own abilities such as :” I’m not a linguistic person, I cannot learn French” or “I’m terrified of speaking in public, I won’t take leadership roles avoiding to address larger audiences”. Sometimes changes are inevitable out of sheer necessity; it’s hard not to speak French when living on a French island. Sometimes an opportunity just crossed my path and in the friendly environment and through the professional coaching at Couperus Circle, a local club of POWERtalk International in The Hague, I not only overcame my fear but I discovered the beauty of bringing your message or your story across in a speech.
What I learned is beautifully said by Charlie Chaplin: ”The best thing in life is to go ahead with all your plans and your dreams, to embrace life and to live everyday with passion, to lose and still keep the faith and to win while being grateful. All of this because the world belongs to those who dare to go after what they want. And because life is really too short to be insignificant.”

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Cruising ...

10/8/2015

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Yesterday there were three cruise-ships "parked" half a mile out of the harbor, waiting for their passengers to return. The beach was full of tourists, sipping at their (first) cocktail of the day even though it was still morning. In the other hand most of them are holding a smartphone or a camera, or even worse a stick to make one of the numerous selfies that later on will be posted on Facebook, Instagram or both.
The water-sport clubs are popular and people on jet-ski's and banana-boats are cheerful and at high speed crossing the bay. Further down the beach, a bride and groom with family ( I assume the young lady dressed in white, with white flowers both in her hand and in her hair to be a bride) are getting on board of a sailboat leaving me with the question whether they will marry or just having lunch while enjoying a boat-trip around the island.
I was asked to take a picture of a couple American tourists who were making a nice long stroll on the beach, honoring the name 'seven mile beach'. They tell me that they got on board in Galveston, Texas; were in Mexico yesterday and are heading for Jamaica next.
And I was thinking my life has been a roller-coaster the past months!

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Our first days on Grand Cayman

10/6/2015

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After only two months “home” in Belgium we arrived last week on the Cayman Islands.
The blue skies, turquoise ocean and white-sand beaches create a holiday feeling on this Caribbean island, but once again I experience how different the feeling is of expatriation to taking holidays.
On my first walks on the beach I did feel more related to the seaweed washed ashore than to the tourists enjoying themselves.
The welcome by locals and the international community is warm and well organised. The advice I get most is: “start exploring and enjoying the things tourists do”.
Still our first shopping day was a hunt for adapters for every socket needed for our European phones, tablets and laptop. Making sure we can stay in touch with our loved ones!

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Routine vs Flexible

3/19/2015

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It is true that I like a certain amount of routine to feel comfortable, but I also get easily bored when life doesn't offer me enough variation and challenges. For that our global mobile life is perfect.
I never had a "wash day" or a fixed day for cleaning the house. I always did what was most urgent or of higher priority: a visit to the doctor with one of the children or joining them on a fieldtrip organised by the teacher.
Chores were to me a Sisyphus task; a never ending story.
In Greek mythology Sisyphus was a king of Ephyra (now known as Corinth). He was punished for chronic deceitfulness by being compelled to roll an immense boulder up a hill. Once he had reached the top he had to let the stone roll back down, to then start all over again, forever.
Maybe this approach enables me more to be flexible, to adept to the needs of family and friends or a new environment. It also relieves me partially of the stress of keeping everything under controle and organised to the minute. There will always be time for cleaning the house or doing the laundry another day.

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A silver lining

1/21/2015

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Our first year on Reunion is listed the driest in 50 years. The drought brought faded and yellow colors to the green hills and gardens of this beautiful island. People were advised not to use sprinklers or waste water. The wet season last year gave us one hurricane with more wind than water, so the rivers and the reservoirs in the fields went empty and one could question why we need the wide and steep drainage next to the roads.

This summer however we are racing towards the award of wettest season in ages. It has been raining for over a month, painting mountains and valleys green again. So far we didn't have any hurricane, although they are swirling around in the south-western part of the Indian Ocean leaving us with daily, heavy rainfall. The drainage is often not wide and steep enough and the rain is coming down the hills in small temporary waterfalls.

The children will start school in a week. They had 6 weeks of summer holiday, without the usual beach and pool parties. And when the heat returns, they will be in classrooms of 30°C or more, without air-conditioning or a cool breeze. It does not seem fair.

I am happy to have indoor hobbies and my painting skills are improving every day. There is always a silver lining!

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